Some people are born with an innate sense of what others feel. They have a good imagination and consciously direct that imagination to put themselves in another person’s shoes. While some kids may be born with empathy, others may not be. Fortunately, if your kid doesn’t seem to have empathy, or have a full grasp of it, they CAN be taught.
Jodi Aman, LCSW, Best-selling author, family therapist, TEDx speaker and Psychotherapist encourages all of us to understand and address the importance of empathy in order to have full happiness in life. She states that “when kids can understand what another person is going through, this helps them read the world, which in turn makes you less vulnerable and feel more in control. When you have insight into what is happening inside people’s minds and hearts, you interact with them in ways that are better for you and them.”
So what practices can we teach them that help them learn how to cultivate empathy? Here are Jodi’s top four tips to get started on right now to teach your kids empathy:
- Practice empathy by discussing characters and events from movies, TV, or books.
This is so great because there is often nothing in the way of this learning. No fear, baggage, or hurt feelings to wade through, and this may help kids gain easier access to their empathy skills.
- Use the Imagination
Kids and teens have great imaginations. (If you don’t believe me, watch a couple of TikTok videos. Those kids are so clever!) Have them close their eyes and imagine: If you were ________, how would you feel?
- Model Empathy
Your kids are witnessing how you respond to them when they are feeling bad. This is a good time to model empathy! Also, let your kids see you (and participate) when you are thoughtful with people going through a hard time. Do you send flowers, offer help, or make dinner when friends are struggling?
- Teach them to take a step back
This is one of the best skills a person can have to cope with life. People can do this once they have compassion for themselves, which you teach them by having empathy for them!
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
