Do your parents make you feel like the worst person ever?
On days like this, I sure wish my mom was here. Not that my mom was much better. But this morning has been horrible. And this bad day started yesterday. It is my dad and the things he says which drives me up a wall. I know it is terrible, but I’m so ready for him to go home.
I miss David more than ever because when he isn’t around my dad says things that are rude to me, and my dad treats my sister like a Princess. There is not, a way for me to get away from my dad all I can do is sit here and take the abuse from my dad.
I do’nt say anything because my dad will get mad and walk out and there isn’t anywhere for him to go. Not only that Charlie is here. I do not want Charlie to see us fight. I just take it and take it and take it and I cannot take it anymore. I’m tired and frustrated.
I just want to yell I am a person and no, I am not perfect, but this is my home and my family. If you do not like it leave. “JUST LEAVE”!! If you never come back, it is OK, with me. I was working this morning and my dad was gripping my office is a mess.
Then my dad insisted on bringing his bed over here and putting it inside my office. Not giving us time to pack things away and now I can’t ever get in there to work. Then my dad goes off on the dogs being in the house. “EXCUSE ME” it was “HAILING” last night. I wasn’t going to leave the dogs outside in the rain. Any more than I would have left my dad out in the rain.
Then he goes off on my nephew who isn’t here to even defend himself. Putting my sister and her home on a “PEDESTAL”. But my sister’s home is much worse than hoarders although my dad doesn’t see that. Debbie is the baby and can do no wrong and never has.
When my mom was alive, it was that way with my brother, Gerald who has done some pretty horrible things, and my mom just looked the other way. All the while telling me how bad a person I am. I’m tired of it, and I would like to move far away from here where I do not have to see them. Or put myself up for adoption even though I’m an adult.
I just keep saying only a couple more days, and my dad will go home. I can handle it, or at least I hope I can. Or wait till David gets back because my dad is mad at him now because he didn’t leave our car here for him to use when he went out of town.
My dad just keeps saying I bought that car for you all and you wouldn’t let me use it. Before the week is over, I’m afraid there will be a knockdown drag out, and I do not know what to do about it. All I can do is to keep Praying and saying God grant me the patience to make it through the next couple days. Please help me change the things I can and to walk away from the ones I can’t change.
As I also PRAY that Charlie not to go off on his grandpa. Who has hurt his mom and Charlie doesn’t like seeing me upset? Please help me not to show David how upset I am when he calls. David is out of town, and he would want to come back right now. That would put his job in jeopardy. We can’t have David losing his job over my dad. It is not worth it. I am a big girl and should be able to walk away. “RIGHT”???
I am standing up for me, my house, and my family and if you do not like it, then you can just pack your bags and leave. I refuse to listen to any more negativity. I am going to do what I want in my home, and if you do not like it, then you can leave and never come back as far as I am concerned.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
