Kids of all ages love to use fashion to express themselves. Whether it’s your toddler wanting to wear a Spiderman costume 24 hours a day, even in the bath, or your teenager heading out to school wearing a bright green mohawk and a miniskirt, you’re going to have some concerns about your kids’ dress sense and you might even get into some battles with them about it. But, for the most part, it’s developmentally appropriate for kids to experiment with fashion, whether they’re little and just learning how to pick out clothes and dress themselves, or older and trying to fit in with a peer group.
When it comes to kids and their fashion sense, you really have to pick your battles. Does it matter if your four-year-old goes to preschool in mismatched socks? Probably not, but you probably shouldn’t let him wear that Spiderman costume to church. You have to teach your kids how to dress themselves, and part of that is giving them the space to experiment with fashion and find their personal style.
Set Some Parameters
Sometimes, it’s perfectly appropriate to let kids experiment with fashion. Your kid can wear a pink tutu and a green leotard to hang out at home or even for a quick trip to Target, weather permitting. But for some occasions, like school or church, your kids are going to need to follow a dress code.
You should set some limits with your kids so that they have the chance to experiment with fashion, but they’re still dressed appropriately for the occasion and the weather. Designate specific occasions or days as parent-choice days, when you get to select your kid’s outfit for specific events like church or other religious services, family gatherings,ceremonial events, weddings and funerals, and holidays. Other days – like weekends – can be kid choice days.
Once your kid gets old enough to go to school, he or she might also be starting to get a more developed sophisticated sense of his or her own style. Most schools have dress codes, so sit down with your kid and go over the requirements and discuss ways that he or she can be creative with fashion while still meeting the requirements. If your child has to wear a school uniform, talk to him or her about being creative with shoes and socks, accessories, bookbags, book covers, and so on.
Take Kids Shopping
Take your kids with you when you go clothes shopping, or have them next to you when you shop for kids’ clothes online. Increasingly as they reach school age, your kids are going to want some input on new additions to their wardrobes. Talk about what kinds of clothes they need, whether it’s school clothes or something more formal. Support them in buying clothes that reflect their interests, like dinosaur patterns or comic book superheroes. Teach them how to try on clothes and how to tell if they fit. If shopping in stores wears your kid out, you can absolutely do all your shopping online instead.
Teach Them the Basics, Then Let Them Experiment
Kids need to know how to dress appropriately for the weather and for the occasion. They also need to know how to put together an outfit. Teach kids how to decide what clothes to wear to a specific event. Talk about the kinds of things you wear to a formal event, versus the kinds of things you wear to a casual event – and what formal and casual mean. Discuss choosing appropriate clothes for specific activities. For example, discuss wearing warm clothes when it’s cold out or putting on athletic gear to play basketball with friends. Reserve the right to veto outfits that aren’t appropriate for the event or activity your kid is going to, but accompany your veto with an explanation and help your kid pick out a more appropriate outfit.
You’ll also need to teach your kids the basics of matching garments to make an outfit that doesn’t clash. Kids are going to need some practice with this, so don’t be surprised if you get some funky pattern and color clashes from young kids. Teach kids the fundamentals, and then take a step back and let them make mistakes.
Kids can really have surprisingly strong opinions on fashion – and many kids love to experiment with fashion just as much as their parents do. Support your kid in discovering his or her personal style, and you’ll have fewer conflicts when it’s time to get dressed in the morning.
