November 26, 2019 – When it comes to parenting, Cadenshae co-founder Adam Clarke has a solid handle on what’s involved. He’s fathered four children in less than five years, and for a good chunk of that time has been viewed as the ‘primary caregiver,’ while his wife, Nikki Clarke, concentrated on growing their activewear business.
During the last five years Mr. Clarke (35) admits to receiving a lot of ‘well-meaning’ sexist remarks. He’s often asked, ‘how does your wife do it all?’ assuming he takes a backseat in parenting, leaving his wife to manage the majority of the children’s care, the house, and the company.
It’s these archaic views Adam wants to set straight, and so he’s begun a campaign to change the way society regards men as fathers and husbands, and to encourage dads to get more involved.
In a recent blog post written by Adam dubbed, ‘How Teamwork makes the Dream work,’ the four time father talks about how he and Nikki run their day-to-day lives, with both mum and dad taking equal responsibility in the care of their children and the household.
The post has been viewed over 50, 000 times, and has received a glowing response from its readers.
“We’ve seen a major shift in how households operate since the 1980s, but we have a long way to go,” says Clarke.
“There’s still a notion out there that women are in charge at home, while men are the money makers, and when they get home, they can put their feet up.”
“These views need to be thrown out. Many women I know are making more money than their partners, and a lot of dads I know are giving their all at home too – this should be recognised, accepted and celebrated.”
“It grates me that in 2019, we’re not entirely there. Things are not equal.”
Recent research shows that better behavioural, emotional and academic outcomes for children are linked to greater quality and quantity of contact with their fathers. However, governments the world over have done little to stress the importance of fathers, with many countries offering no or very little in the way of paternal leave.
New Zealand for example currently only offers two weeks leave for dads, if they’re not deemed the primary care-giver.
Nikki Clarke says the status quo is unfair on both parents.
“Fathers miss out on precious time with their children because they’re expected to be at work, it’s really tough on dads too.”
Mrs Clarke says when a woman returns to work, she’s still regarded as the main care-giver and is expected to perform her job to the same standard she did before she had her baby.
“This can be extremely difficult when their partner either isn’t supportive enough, or his workplace isn’t open to the fact he may have to do more on the home-front now he’s a dad.”
“Women need more support. Dad’s need to be available for pick-ups, sick days, to get the milk on the way home etc. Not only this, but we need employers to encourage their working dads to well…be a dad.”
Adam Clarke says next year Cadenshae will focus more on spreading awareness around this issue and in the hope of altering societal views.
“We need equality for both men and women in this area, because teamwork truly does make the dream work,” says Clarke.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
