Parenting is tough work, and it’s work which will be even tougher after we face stress and adversity. However, we all know that there’s nothing more important than the parent/child relationship in terms of future learning, behavior, and health. There are actions each parent can do in order to reduce the strain and burden especially during the pandemic.
1. Show Compassion to others.
Check in on your neighbor to confirm they have all that they need. Try to find ways to assist others and involve your children, like: making cards, gifts or crafts for a neighbor; getting groceries for a neighbor; singing songs outside their window; donating to the local bank or shelter.
You can also offer to volunteer for childcare so parents and caregivers don’t seem to be in difficult situations and risk leaving children unsupervised or in neglectful environments.
Above all you can deliver a meal.
2. Remain calm and reassuring.
Use a relaxed voice and never appear upset in front of your kids. If you are feeling anxious, take a deep breath to relax before jumping into a conversation together with your child. It is also helpful to reassure your child that children won’t be as prone to getting sick as adults.
Tell your child that you simply will keep them updated as you learn more about the coronavirus and that they are always welcome to ask questions. Make yourself available to pay attention to their thoughts and feelings. Don’t ignore their concerns.
Children often imagine situations far worse than reality. If you see changes in your kid that concern you, do not be afraid to achieve dead set healthcare professionals for help. Give your child specific things they will do to feel up to the mark. Monitor that your kids are taking care of themselves by checking in on them that they are washing their hands with soap for at least 20 seconds and remind them to remain far from people that are coughing or sick.
3. Take care of yourself.
Take a break and ask your spouse or partner to step in and help. Seek help if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Talk to someone, voicing out pent up emotions is cathartic. If there is no one you can talk to, self-talk is helpful too.
Maintain individual and family routines. Structured days with regular meals, bedtime and scheduled activities are a great help for everyone to stay safe and healthy. Help your child concentrate on what they’re doing today and continue their routine to establish consistency and a sense of normalcy.
If you are one of the many people doing work from home, share your work schedule with your family, this way distractions will be limited and your children will know when not to disturb you.
Above all, remember, there is no such thing as a perfect parent but there are many ways you can be a decent one–so give yourself and your children an additional dose of compassion and care during these challenging days. Be easy on yourself during this unprecedented time. Some days, either you and/or the kids might find yourself in pajamas all day before a screen. It’s okay. Some days, it would just be enough to survive. Tomorrow could be a new day, so always look forward to it.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
