Each week Charlie ask for his friends to come over and each time I have to remind him that they can not come over as he hasn’t cleaned his room up. Or that he hasn’t helped clean the living room or pick up the dishes which is part of Charlie’. How do you get your children to do chores?
Telling Chalie no, leads to a huge argument with Charlie storming around the house screaming I hate you and don’t talk to me ever. Then I hear David saying I will help you clean your room Charlie. When I tell David no, you will not help Charlie clean his room because it is Charlie’s responsibility David gets upset with me but I don’t think it should be Davids job to clean Charlie’s room.
When I was a child I had chores and that included keeping my room clean or I couldn’t play. Now, I didn’t like cleaning my room but after my dad coming in with trash bags and throwing everything away a couple times I learned what I needed to do and that there would be consequences to pay for not cleaning my room. I learned to keep it clean or to lose my belongings.
I would like to let you know this week each and every room in our trailer is going to be gutted and cleaned and we are redoing the entire house. From painting to replacing doors along with purchasing items we need for our home to turn it into a house. To do this Charlie must agree to help around the house or David has refused to take us shopping for paint.
I am also proud to say once our home is redone I will have a brand new office all my own and my office will not be used for anything other than a office. The living room and kitchen will be what they were created for and I will not be working in the living room or kitchen any longer.
David has promised me a new Living Room Set and I can’t wait to pick out the couch and for it to be delivered. We just need to find a couch all three of us like and would want to use. Including the style and color couch we decide on. Although I must tell you it hasn’t been as easy as it sounds because each of us including Charlie likes a different style couch or color.
Charlie’s room is also getting gutted and put back together along with the Garden Shed in the front yard. If we can we are redoing the yard as well. With all the money we are spending on turning this house into a home I am praying our Landlord Tommy will allows us to purchase the trailer and take some of the money off the cost of the trailer in exchange for all the improvements we have made.
Is it wrong of me to expect Charlie to help us keep our home clean and organized so his friends can come over and play? Is it wrong for us to give Charlie chores to do and to expect him to do them? Or should we as his parents just do the housework and allow Charlie to be a child which is what my mother in law says we should do?
As I was online this week I was reading new and different ways to get Charlie to remember to do his chores and one of the ways is to use less words. I am going to try that this week and see how it works. Now when I say to use less words this is what I mean. Example Instead of saying clean your room… I will say clean room
As well as using less words when explaining things Charlie does wrong such as climbing on the couch because we all know Couches are meant for sitting on not climbing on. Especially when we are purchasing new living room furniture. Now when asking Charlie to clean his room I will also give him choices. Charlie you can clean your room now or you can clean your room next week but you will not be able to have Aiden over.
I know things will not change overnight but at least I have a plan and things will get easier with time. I just have to make sure I stand firm and don’t waver. Or do the things I am asking Charlie to do myself which isn’t teaching Charlie anything other than wait it out and mom or dad will do it for me.
Thank you,
Glenda, Charlie and David Cates
